Week 15- The End

Hola familia y amigos!

By now you might have heard the news. If not here we go.

I have been struggling with severe depression and anxiety for a long
long time. The mission field is highly stressful and my depression has
gotten worse. The Church has wonderful programs to help people like me
who face problems like mine and I am so grateful for the help I have
received here in the field. Even with the help I have had serious
thoughts of suicide. This past week during a panic attack I broke down
and took a razor to my skin. I felt so low and dark. No one would have
know but my mission president, President Slaughter, asked me to report
serious event about my depression to him. He heard the news and is
obligated to report information like this to mission headquarters. Now
the church is willing to help heal me but I am a risk to myself and
the well being of the church. The Church doesn't want to gamble with a
missionary's mental health or, in my case, self harm.

I will be coming home on Tuesday.

This is medical release and I am under the impression I will not be
allowed to return to the field. I am so sorry. You all were incredible
in your support to get me out here and to help me while I've been
here. It truly takes a village to raise a missionary. You all deserve
missionaries who are strong, and valiant and can push on through hard
times. I wish that could have been me. I didn't want to let you, the
people I love most of all, down.

I do want you all to know that this week I have worked my hardest. We
set 6 people with a baptismal date, got 13 people to come to church,
and taught 9 lessons coming to a total of 7 progressing investigators.
For those of you who don't understand what my missionary talk means.
Know this, my area is doing best in the entire mission of Texas San
Antonio!

It's been a short while, but I am in the business of changing heart
and in this past 4 months that is exactly what I have done!

I am a servant of the Lord Jesus Christ,
called of Him by prophecy and revelation,
and assigned to serve in the Texas San Antonio Mission.
I have been sent to teach repentance and baptize converts.
This is who I am and this is why I am here!

I invite others to come unto Christ by helping them receive the
restored gospel through faith in Jesus Christ and His Atonement,
repentance, baptism, receiving the Gift of the Holy Ghost, and
enduring to the end.

My decision has been made. I've put my hand to the plough. I've
crossed the line. So as much as in me is, I am ready to preach the
Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Every Sister, every Elder, all in!

Love,
Elder Hollingsworth

Week 14

Dear family, 

Dull week...PSYCHE! We straight baptised Ruben!!!! Guess who he asked to confirm him...ME. It was Spanish and I aced it! The Gift of Tongues is real! I love it here!

Transfers just happens and I'll be staying here and staying happy! I'll get to see the Mutters get baptised! They are progressing so well! At this rate we will baptise the whole area. 

Well actually let me talk about Friday night. We were in a super ghetto area. We were looking for those humble enough to receive change in their lives. Surprisingly everyone was impatient and angry. Hmm signs of a rough time in their lives. Well we got door after door slammed on us. That's ok we are planting seeds. They will come around soon enough.

Well here are some pics.

Love y'all,
Elder Hawkeye 

Week 13

Dear Home, La obra es muy picante! (The work is super spicy)! We set 3 people with baptism dates! Ruben is awesome he is a Spanish member and is super cool. He's so funny and has a lot of questions and it's awesome it gives me a chance to rely on the spirit. He was struggling with word of wisdom and coffee.  I said a prayer in my heart and started to speak. The Gift of Tongues gets is real my Spanish was fire. And he agreed to follow the word of wisdom and give up coffee! He is getting baptized this Saturday! The Mutters are straight hicks. We found them by a miracle. A lesson fell through and they were near where we were at the time and we scheduled an appointment and it's been all up hill from there! They love church! They are gonna be baptized on April 19th. We had a really hard day this week. Saturday was miserable. All of our appointments fell through and then our dinner did too. She didn't cook for us she bought us Bill Miller's barbecue. It was terrible. Read Doctrine and Covenants 121:1-5 that's how I felt. We threw it away. Elder Bartier got emergency transferred! So our trio is now a normal companionship. He got transferred because our zone leader became assistant to the president and Elder Bartier is the companion to our zone leader. It's complicated. I love you all! Elder Hawkeye

Week 11

This week was hard. We invited the "V" family, who are so ready for
baptism, to be baptized. They said yes, then backed out. It absolutely
crushed me. They were a bit upset and said they wouldn't come to
church. We fasted for them, and they came to church!! The Lord
provides!

Happy Birthday Dad! You're super old. Hopefully you aren't dead before
I come home.

Missionary work is hard. This week wasn't fun. For your guy's sake
I'll leave the details out, but I want to testify of the power of God.
He caries me through everything. When I don't think I can keep going
he pulls me along, when I am in a lesson the spirit teaches, I am
learning Spanish faster than humanly possible and that is a miracle on
its own. God is with me. I know e gospel is true and that the church
is the way Christ promotes our faith. I know the scriptures are true,
and reading them will change your life, no matter how many times
you've read them. I know that Joseph smith was a prophet, and I know
we have a prophet today. Revelation is real.

I love you all,
Hawkeye

Here are some pictures

Week 10

Dear Family and Friends,

Well I'm in double digits for my weeks. I guess that means I'm a pro
missionary. This week has been swell!

We had a bunch of appointments! Juliana had her baby!!!! He's so cute
and healthy. So I guess we got a free new investigator. She is so
happy and she came to church we just didn't see her. She also cute the
dad out of her life which is awesome cause he was a tool!

We went to a gardening expo and served food because the ward members
think we are free labor...freaking white people. But it's ok we got
free succulents they are called campfire succulents and are beautiful!
I named mine Phoenix. I will care for him for my whole mission because
succulents are super easy to care for. The master gardener (yes that's
a thing) told me water it once a month. So awesome!

Spanish is incredible I gave a talk in the Spanish group Sunday. It
was so cool. I had no fear because faith and fear or doubt can not
dwell in the same place. ¡Yo soy valiente! (I am brave!)
Hispanics are incredible. We had a meal with a Hispanic couple and
they invited our investigator they only have a table big enough for 4
people they gave the seats to us three companions and our
investigator. They truly see us as emissaries of the Lord. They are so
kind and generous...and don't look at us as free labor.

I'm learning how to juggle! I'm really good at it! Also we got a
coconut and smashed it on the ground like we are cave men it's so
yummy. Also thanks grandma for the cookies they were awesome! Everyone
should send me cookies or cookie mix or something like that because
you love me. Quiero galletas. (I want cookie). Thanks in advanced!

Love,
HawkEye

Week 9

Hello family and friends, It has been a wild week. Juliana didn't come to church and that absolutely crushed me. We had such a good lesson with her. Keep her in your prayers. We also taught the Valdez family they are amazing! Brother "V" has a calling and taught elders quorum this week I mean come on how ready is he?!? My companions and I had talks in one of our wards this week. We spoke on elder Larry R Lawrence's conference talk "what lack I yet". It was good and we got a lot of compliments so that's awesome. We had a few of our investigators at church so that was really cool. Brother "R" stopped smoking! He has a baptism date in 2 weeks he can do it. Please keep him in your prayers. Being a missionary is rad. We learn so much so fast. My Spanish is going a whole ton better. I can communicate with a lot of people and I understand almost everything I read! The church is true. The gospel is great and the lord loves his children. If anyone wants to give me an amazing gift Send me a bandana to wear. I love you all, HawkEye I got a sweet new shirt, and elder Lawrence made a cake and it went terrible.

Week 8

Hola Amigos,

I hope y'all are doing great! Cause I sure am. I love it here! Me and
my companions got buck wild this week. We went to wing stop with some
new converts and they got us crazy hot wings. They had ghost peppers
in them! If you didn't know ghost peppers are the hottest peppers in
the world... I screamed

We met this girl named Juliana. She is so golden and ready for the
gospel. She is super humble and sweet. She is going through hard times
because she is pregnant and really young. But even though her life is
hard she is very grateful to God for all of her blessings. I really
admire that about her. We invited her to church and she didn't come. I
was devastated.

We talked to this crazy lady. She was super drunk. It was a blast I
learned a good lesson. Keep control of your body so you don't look
dumb. Pray for her soul.

I got my first hair cut. I look pretty fly! Elder Lawrence did a
pretty neat job if you ask me. Also Elder Villeda and I shaved each
others legs. So that's cool. Tambien cociné una pastel. (Also I cooked a cake) it was soooo good!